Saint Lottie: The Merciful Caregiver
A brief 1-part story about Ludmila (Petrasek) Kubes
This is the story of my great-grandaunt on my father’s side of the family tree, who spent her entire life caring for others, all while bearing unbelievable grief.
On 19 July 1908, at age sixteen, Ludmila Petrasek became a mother to her seven younger siblings including the baby Alois, born just moments before their mother died. Lottie, as she was known, was the fifth child of Frank and Anna (Bouska) Petrasek; however the four older siblings had all died, three before Lottie was even born. Now, as the oldest living female child, the role of mother to seven was an expectation she embraced dutifully by dropping out of school to take care of the children, the home and her father.
Having lost his wife of twenty-five years, Lottie’s father buried his grief in long-hours at the Foundry. He was able to provide money for food and decent shelter for his family, if not the emotional support Lottie may have needed. But, the seven younger siblings were never wanting for the kind of love and attention a mother can provide. By observing and helping her mother for years, Lottie had learned the nuances of caring for a home and family. She was a natural nurturer and quickly learned when to coddle vs. discipline. She knew how to sew, clean and cook. Like her namesake, the Patron Saint of Bohemia, Lottie was kind, merciful and pious. The children loved her like a mother and the girls in particular learned about the role of a woman in the caring and keeping of a family.
By 1910, Lottie was 18 years old and all but the two youngest children were attending school, which made her regular chore of shopping for groceries much easier. She frequented the nearby Kubes Brothers Grocers; a 6-minute walk from her home. This is where she met John Kubes, whom she later married on her 22nd birthday. Lottie’s three youngest siblings (Rose, 10 years old; Stanley, 8 years old; and Alois, 5 years old) came to live with the newly married couple who resided just a 4-minute walk away from their father’s home.
For all intents and purposes, Lottie was a mother — the only mother these three youngest children ever knew — and now John was a father. The couple had an instant family. John worked hard as the proprietor of his grocery business and they lived in a cozy home nearby. Lottie and John did not become pregnant with their own child until late 1921, but sadly the child — a boy — was stillborn. No other births were recorded for her; however, the home was rarely without a child. Alois, her youngest brother, lived with the couple from the moment they were married up until he was 17 years old in about 1925.
Having experienced the death of one older sibling when she was eight years old; the death of her mother when she was sixteen; and the stillborn death of her own son when she was 30, Lottie was no stranger to bearing the weight of grief. But Iin the summer of 1932 when she was 40 years old, Alois — Lottie’s youngest sibling whom she had raised since birth — was killed while on a holiday weekend at a resort in Iowa, where he was a restaurant owner. He was only 23 years old. The death was sudden, tragic and so completely overwhelming that neither she, her husband, nor even her father were able to make the trip to Iowa to claim young Alois’ body. Instead, Stanley, just a few years older than Alois, made the trip. Although he had a short life, Alois’ story is filled with drama.
By 1940, Lottie’s four-year-old niece was living with her and John. The child — Betty Lou Petrasek, daughter of Stephen and Elizabeth (Haider) — recalls living with her Aunt Lottie until she was in 2nd grade because her own mother was “sickly” quite a bit. Betty Lou said that Lottie was like a mother to her, sewing her clothes and being an “excellent” cook. Custard pudding was a favorite.
Then, in March of 1940, John’s sister and her husband were killed in a house fire after tossing their two children out of a window into a snowbank in an effort to save them. These two young girls, aged two and four, lived with Lottie and John throughout the remainder of their childhood, only moving out as young adults. Once again, Lottie was the only mother the two would ever know.
During this time Lottie’s father also became ill and required regular care-giving which she and little Betty Lou did together. Frank died in 1945.
Lottie’s role as caregiver continued throughout her life, as she cared for her ailing husband who eventually died in 1971. She outlived all but one of the siblings she had raised, dying in September of 1982 at age 90. Lottie, her husband, father and mother, as well as Alois are all buried near each other in Calvary Cemetery in St. Paul, Minnesota.
Named for the kind and merciful Patron Saint of Bohemia, Lottie cared her younger siblings as a young woman and into their adulthood, often caring for their children as well. Despite at times the unbearable grief she bore throughout her life, she was known to be a happy woman, who never complained and always shared joy with those around her.
Prompts more questions about are family history.
Remarkable, you have a real story telling talent.